An excerpt from a book by Jersey Shore’s Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino.
Battle that beat bra
Auto-Bro Reblog
(via acidarmor)
(Source: irateprimate)
British Petrolium is an evil BP. Bristol Palin is kind of a fun, distracting, silly BP.
And both are involved in drilling in their own way!
Yes, but it’s not Bristol’s fault that the cap wasn’t kept on the well.
Years ago…
My sister’s friend: Oh my god I have had the worst day. You will not believe what happened. I just got home from fucking Duane Reade—
Her mom: Whoa, slow down, sweetie. Just a minute. Duane who?
Creepier, but still amazing.
Amazing. Hands down amazing.
- Now We Know Who The Miscreant Is
- I’ve Changed My Plea To Guilty
- You Haven’t Earned It Yet
- If You Don’t Like Me, Don’t Look At Me
- Your Girlfriend Was In A Coma
- You Were Smitten With Her
- We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful
- Where Had You Been Drinking, Mr. Jones?
- Sorry Doesn’t Help
KELSEY GRAMMER PLEASE MARRY TORI SPELLING AND HYPHENATE
You and the Little Mermaid can go fuck yourselves. I told you to stay near the phone. I can’t find those books, you have other books here…it must be in La Hoya. Call me back, I’m not going to stay up all night for you. Buhbye!
